Surgery Success!!

If this post doesn't all make since it is because I am still on drugs. I had surgery yesterday and from what I hear it was a success. I was in surgery for about an hour (a lot shorter than what I was previously told). He said that my tube was really long, which is a good thing. There was a lot of scar tissue on the top of the tube so unfortunately he had to cut off 3/4 of an inch, which cut off all of the finger like hair follicles that help the egg move down the tube. The good thing is that now it is patent, and he said that it had a pretty wide opening which will all be in my favor. At my post-op apt he will put me on some medication that will help increase my ovulation. Hopefully in the next month or two I will be able to say that I am pregnant. I have these three really sweet scars to add to my collection. One is on my belly button, and two below the bikini line. I feel great!! I am not in too much pain, I even bought two pairs of shoes tonight, (I think I went a little too overboard). I am mostly just tired, and itchy. I thought I didn't like the Percocet because it was making me itchy, so Dr. Chalmers wrote for Lortab and that is not really doing much in terms of pain, I guess I can't win all battles. Timmy has been a great husband the whole time, watching out for me, carrying my purse around, getting me ice packs, making me breakfast and getting me dinner. He will be a great daddy. The only unfortunate thing is that I have no pictures of me going or coming out of surgery. I told Timmy to take pictures, but he forgot. I am sure I was saying funny things. I do have pictures that Dr. Chalmers took of my insides. I will have to edit my post and scan them in. I really appreciate everyone that has given us their prayers, my family for bringing us dinner, Riley for bringing me a magazine and otter pops, Chris and Nancy for the flowers and everyone else for their phone calls, and text messages it has really helped me feel good.

monthly post!

I have now started to slow down in my busy life, with the exception of Timmy (this is the busy time of year for him, he is still teaching as well as getting the St. George City Pool ready for its opening Memorial Day). I am now doing things that I like to do, well finding things that I like to do. I have never really had much time to do anything I like. I cleaned my house top to bottom, I just got back from San Diego visiting my little nephews, and my sister. We had fun spending time at the beach and going to Disneyland. The boys were so funny to be with saying and doing funny things. After the busy month of May I will be having surgery in a few weeks to try and roter ruter my left tube. I am getting a little nervous about the surgery, but I am ready to have kids. I now feel like I am making progress in the baby process. It has been really fun the last 3 weeks to try and do new things and not feel so tied down from school.

Life goes on

Life if like a roller coaster some time it is up and sometime it is down. I hope and will try to make the rest of this year on the up. School is almost over, and as I sit in class right now...haha, we will only have 3 more weeks and then I will have my BSN.

Just so this doesn't have the be the elephant in the room I will just let everyone know I lost my right tube due to a cyst when I was 14. I have one tube and it is blocked. My only options now are IVF or surgery. Many doctors have told me to skip surgery because of the risk of more scar tissue, tubal pregnancy, and of course possible damage to the other reproductive organs. However my tube is blocked on the outside and not on the inside, which means that I have a great chance of pregnancy. My thought is my tube right now doesn't work, so if it gets damaged and it won't work then I am in the same boat that I am in right now. I could be that special person where everything goes well and I can have multiple pregnancies, and never have to do IVF, or surgery again. I will be having surgery June 6 after I graduate, and after Timmy gets done, so he can take care of me.

As most of you know I have had 3 grandpas pass away in 8 months. It has been mostly hard for my family losing my grandpa that lives here in town. We have been close to them, and we would see them often. My heart goes out to my grandma. I know how much she is hurting, and no one knows just how she feels. I think the one thing about his death that has been good is that I feel much closer to my grandma, almost like I need to protect her. I spent the first night of his loss with her and it was particullarly hard for me to see he hurt in her face and the pain that she went through. Just so my life doesn't look so depressing here are some pictures from the past few months.

Tyce, Evan, Todd, Dad, Lani, Grandpa, Grandma, Leslie

My grandpa will greatly be missed

Kennedy, Tucker, Brody

Taft, Clark, Lincoln

Todd, Neil and Naomi



two Leslies

 

Evan, Whitney



Katie and "little evi"



Taylor and Kris

Zane

 


You know life is crazy. One second your happy and doing the things that you love, and you have hope. The next second your told you can't do something that you have wanted your whole life. Life then moves in slow motion and you feel like you are trying to catch up with everything. Then while you are already down, someone steps on your chest.They tell you that you can't make mistakes, you have to try harder, no one is out to get you (but most of the mistakes you have made...the same person is complaining about). I am a doer. I like getting things done and I like seeing my progress. I like following steps. I have never been good at anything I have only been average at everything. The one thing I know I would be good at I can now not do on my own. My husband tells me that I have just hit a few bumps in the road. I am expecting too much out of myself. He says I am a great wife, a good nurse and I would be an even better mother. I have now not really eaten anything for three days but I am not hungry. I just want to be a great nurse and a mother. I love the medical field I am interested in it and I am good in emergencies. I move fast, I am on top of my game. But somehow I just don't know if I can be a nurse. 

I am back!!

It has been probably 6 months since I have truly been myself. I graduated nursing school, started working as a brand new nurse...the bottom of the totum pole, the newbie, the one who "doesn't know anything because she's new." And honestly I have felt like that. I started school directly after graduating and have been back to the books. I have been going to school since Kindergarten. My health has been in the crap hole. Coughing un-controllably for years now, and feeling like you can't breathe is not something fun. My heart would also feel funny and jump a lot. On my days off I would sit in front of the T.V. watching a movie, or two, or watching Grey's. I wouldn't do anything, I would lay around and do nothing. I am starting to feel much more like myself again. I went to an excellent allergist, found out I have major allergies, and a heart murmur, He put me on another medication that has helped a lot...I think, I guess time will tell. I am still having palpitations but hopefully those will go away or something. I am still getting testing done, but for the first time in years, I am feeling much better about the results. I started working on this book called 12 weeks to fertility. For months I have been seeing an herbalist her name is Julie. I have used her herbs for my coughing, and my overall health. Although I like her there was something else that I was missing. I started reading this book and I feel like I am focusing more on each organ, my eating habits, finding time to increase my Qi. I have also started doing yoga, thanks to my brother. It gives me time to clear my mind, and feel relaxed. Hopefully I will be able to keep all this up. Now I just need to get pregnant. :)

Back home, back to reality

Leaving the country of Costa Rica was a sad and happy thing. I think I was done with a few things in that country. First is the beans and rice for every meal. I was also done with not understanding the language, and the homeless dogs. The things I miss the most are of course the beach, the fruit and being with my husband 24/7. Driving into the gorge was beautiful, the orange color of the mountains against the clear blue haze of the sunset reminded me how much I love where we live, and happy that we are in America. The first day home we went back to work, and I came back to homework. This will be my last semester and I am so glad.  I just want to work and save money and have kids and travel, you can't forget about the traveling. My goals for the next coming weeks are to get my two spare bedrooms cleaned and organized and to finish the dresser in my garage. 

Humbled in Costa Rica

           It is the 5th day of our trip and once again we are having a great time. We started off the day going to church. At first I was a little bugged about our decision to go to the little branch in Manuel Antonio. We had been up until 0200, and then woke up around 0730, we were tired and we had played hard the day before. When we got into town we followed the missionaries directions to get to the branch house. We were told to look for the sign on the building that would identify the building as The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I knew the building would not be anything like the buildings that we have in the states but I didn't realize that it would be almost exactly the way the small shack looking houses that people in the city were living in...well it was a little better than those houses. We were a little late and we had unfortunately missed the passing of the sacrament. While we were walking in one of the new members was getting confirmed a member of the church. Afterwards we quickly went to the back of the building, which was four rows back. Sitting there in a room full of 38 people (that is including the 11 children) was a humbling experience. We were in a room where we all believed in the same thing, singing the same songs that we normally sing in English. We didn't know anyone and no one knew us. We did not know what they were saying but we didn't need to. The people were happy and surrounded by a spirit that made me feel comfortable and calm. 

Here is the outside of the church building

 These are some of the houses just before you get to Manuel Antonio

              After church we met our group and went for a walk on the beach. We walked probably 1.5 miles just down to the other end where all the rocks were. The sun was intense and my legs were burning after all the walking, hiking and boogie boarding from the days before. I started getting a little sick from being hungry and being a little dehydrated. We ate some lunch at an excellent restaurant, one of the best this trip. We got chicken and rice, which was all mixed together, with it came a little salad with a vegetable that is part of the tops of the palm trees. It was also served with plantains and yucca. Wow they are great!! Ella has also continued to amaze us with her blended black beans, Salsa Lizano sauce, gallo pinto, and great eggs. After our lunch we went to Iguana tours and before loading the bus got some delicious ice cream. In their ice cream shops they have really odd flavors like cookie with caramel and orange, rum with fruit, and of course they great coconut and blackberry. They also everywhere sell their fresh fruit juice. Blackberry, strawberry, watermelon, mango, tamarind, passion fruit, guanabana, and cas fruits are what they typically serve for juice. We got in the bus and we went to our catamaran tour. We were on a boat for about 3.5 hours circling the coast of Manuel Antonio and got to snorkel, watch the sunset, dance, and even get stung by a jelly fish :). We had a great time, and before going home we got more ice cream, stopped by a market, a bakery and then went and sang karaoke. Now we are home and planning to sleep in our room above the ocean. Tomorrow will be a new day full of sun, sand, surf and of course always something new. 

The Long walk

Me and the Girls

Timmy Karaoke to Hotel California